I agree. For better or worse, when big names join this platform, it legitimizes it and, in turn, our work as well. It's also such a thrill to know that we are sharing space with these writers!
Wow! I had no idea she left. 🤣 I am always disappointed when women are mean, snide, and unsupportive to other women. Isn't it time that we rise to dismantle the crap going on in the world. I am sick and tired of hearing from old, white, wealthy men running the world. Women are amazing, caring, and emotional. That does not mean we should be silent, small, and quiet. I am sick of following the rules set by men. Thank you, Sarah, for your powerful words. I am with you!
It doesn’t sound like her critics were being silent, small, or quiet, though?
So which is it - the problem that other women were “mean” (we get a right to be that sometimes, shedding our smallness, our quietness) or that we are too delicate to be treated honestly or take feedback?
Glennon is a high-profile figure. I blocked her (no ill-will, simply videos filled my feed and that isn’t my preferred medium) so I didn’t see the criticism. But in reading a lot of these comments, and the post, it sounds to me like a lot of sympathy (fair) and infantalizing (absurd).
If Glennon was able to freely make the best choice for herself, i don’t know what we’re complaining about. Of course everybody deserves respect, but it doesn’t sound like she was bullied. She likely got a response in size proportionate to her name recognition, and some of that she didn’t like or expect, and made a choice. I mean, should I be writing a post claiming that this author and the folks commenting & restacking simply weren’t supportive or nice enough to compel her to stay? Is the choice ours, or Glennon’s?
I hear what you’re saying, and yes, public figures aren’t above critique. But critique and dehumanisation aren’t the same thing. My piece wasn’t suggesting women can’t be direct or critical. It was pointing to how quickly those conversations—especially online—can slip from accountability into something more cutting, performative, or punishing. We should also maybe save the sharp edge of our tongues for when people have actually done something wrong. All Glennon did was show up. What happened here was a mass triggering of a group of insecure women.
It’s absolutely valid to feel disappointed by a public figure doing something in a way that doesn’t align with how you want things to be done. But Glennon isn’t responsible for resolving those feelings of scarcity or betrayal in others. She made a personal choice based on what was right for her. That doesn’t erase the conversations we might want to have about her platform or decisions—but it also doesn’t justify the tone of some of the commentary I saw which was bitchy and ugly.
I’m not arguing that we all need to be endlessly kind or gentle. I’m saying we can challenge each other and still hold space for humanity. That we can talk about power and platform without projecting our personal disappointments onto someone else. And that how we respond to moments like this says a lot about the kind of culture we’re shaping—not just the one we’re reacting to.
Great piece, Sarah. I’m still trying to process my feelings about it all. When I read certain Notes on Substack yesterday I was scratching my head as I couldn’t understand what she had done that was so wrong. And it all leaves a rather unpleasant after taste. You’re so right, it will put potential readers off from coming to the platform.
Couldn't agree more with your words...and I can't help but unsee the truth that the writer who wrote the passive aggressive "I love you but there is no room for you here" piece used it as an opportunity to try and go viral (ironic, right?) ugh.
She is an activist that does good work for all. I wasn't aware of her until I read this and ffs the women who pushed her out should be ashamed of themselves. Anyone who does positive work is needed more than ever in this world. It doesn't matter about fame.
This all makes me so sick, that I don't even want to find the damn open letter. One more view to crap doesn't feel right. I'll just trust that it was total BS.
🎯I wrote a few notes since yesterday - also connected with Abby and Glennon was gracious and kind - and responded to me too. This literally made me sick. I’ve experienced this kind of scapegoating. Furious.
It’s so awful. There’s just no need at all and people who are saying that she should be big enough to take the criticism just don’t in my opinion have a point. She’s just a human being like the rest of us.
Thank you Kelly, I'm catching up now. And, I AM FURIOUS. I'll try to ready out to Glennon also, but if you hear again, please let them know MANY secure women are furious this happened to her.
This whole situation has broken my heart. Did we as a community (I say we but I’m very new here) just create the platform we didn’t want? When I received Glennon’s email I had so much respect for her boundaries. And I calculated this platform just lost at least 100K new followers that she brought with her.
Well, this is it isn’t it Elizabeth. She would’ve brought a whole load of people here who hadn’t used Substack before and some of them would’ve stuck around and started paying attention to and reading the work of other people. And that has now also been lost. People are so incredibly shortsighted.
Amen, sister. I hate that this happened, but it sure seemed to separate the wheat from the chaff over here. I just wrote a whole thing about scapegoating, and how this was a textbook example of that. I am so sad and mad and disappointed, and I'm also so proud of the quiet dignity and deep embodiment that she displayed in not taking that shit. Thank you for perfectly verbalizing the way that women keep other women small.
THIS:
"Jealousy disguised as discernment.
Scarcity disguised as values.
Gatekeeping masked as integrity."
Yes, yes, a thousand yeses. The saccharine magnanimous notes pleading her to please consider the little people and have some humility were the ones that really got my temperature up. I've been manipulated by too many people tucking their judgment in between compliments to not feel triggered by that nonsense. Sigh.
“I've been manipulated by too many people tucking their judgment in between compliments to not feel triggered by that nonsense.” Same, Lighthouse. Off to read your piece now 🕯️♥️
Oh Sarah this was immense and expressed so perfectly and I am both heartbroken and enraged at how people can be so cruel but also so blind to the ripple impact of having someone like Glennon here. It saddens me that there is still so much competitive bitchiness between women. You raise so many important points and I truly hope some of those people who chased her away with their mean girl attitude will see their mistakes… sadly I’m not sure they will but well done for writing these words. We get to rise together. Xxx
Thank you Lauren. I think history shows us that these kind of people do never learn because the viewpoint is so firmly focused on themselves and what things mean to them that they just don’t really see it. I only hope that the next woman to arrive here who already has a profile Isn’t treated in the same way. I do actually think that there was something specific to GD about all of this.
This🙌🏻 I’ve always been amazed at the whole female empowerment movement who tell you can do anything and then when you do tear you down. Let’s change this.
I hate it too. I wish she wouid come back but I also don’t wish that kind of nonsense on anyone.
This was perfection, Sarah. Honored to know you and your beautiful mind
Love you Abbey! 🙌🏻✨❤️
Her being here shined a light on the rest of us. I'm selfishly upset that she's gone. And just regular upset, because she's one of the good ones.
I so agree! I’ll miss her even though she was only here for a moment x
I agree. For better or worse, when big names join this platform, it legitimizes it and, in turn, our work as well. It's also such a thrill to know that we are sharing space with these writers!
And she would have brought readers for some of us. And now her people think this isn’t a good place. Deeeeeep sigh.
Yep. And that’s what happens when we ostracize anyone for any reason. We’re not just cut them out but a whole crowd of “thems”. Damn.
I knew something felt off-putting about all those comments but I couldn't quite put my finger on it. Thank you for sharing this, Sarah!
The way it was done was a masterpiece in nastiness delivered as some sort of kindnesd or sensitivity wasn’t it. Breathtaking really.
It was shockingly cruel. Thank you for your courage to say something.
Wow! I had no idea she left. 🤣 I am always disappointed when women are mean, snide, and unsupportive to other women. Isn't it time that we rise to dismantle the crap going on in the world. I am sick and tired of hearing from old, white, wealthy men running the world. Women are amazing, caring, and emotional. That does not mean we should be silent, small, and quiet. I am sick of following the rules set by men. Thank you, Sarah, for your powerful words. I am with you!
Yes Blythe! I feel all of this too ❤️
It doesn’t sound like her critics were being silent, small, or quiet, though?
So which is it - the problem that other women were “mean” (we get a right to be that sometimes, shedding our smallness, our quietness) or that we are too delicate to be treated honestly or take feedback?
Glennon is a high-profile figure. I blocked her (no ill-will, simply videos filled my feed and that isn’t my preferred medium) so I didn’t see the criticism. But in reading a lot of these comments, and the post, it sounds to me like a lot of sympathy (fair) and infantalizing (absurd).
If Glennon was able to freely make the best choice for herself, i don’t know what we’re complaining about. Of course everybody deserves respect, but it doesn’t sound like she was bullied. She likely got a response in size proportionate to her name recognition, and some of that she didn’t like or expect, and made a choice. I mean, should I be writing a post claiming that this author and the folks commenting & restacking simply weren’t supportive or nice enough to compel her to stay? Is the choice ours, or Glennon’s?
I hear what you’re saying, and yes, public figures aren’t above critique. But critique and dehumanisation aren’t the same thing. My piece wasn’t suggesting women can’t be direct or critical. It was pointing to how quickly those conversations—especially online—can slip from accountability into something more cutting, performative, or punishing. We should also maybe save the sharp edge of our tongues for when people have actually done something wrong. All Glennon did was show up. What happened here was a mass triggering of a group of insecure women.
It’s absolutely valid to feel disappointed by a public figure doing something in a way that doesn’t align with how you want things to be done. But Glennon isn’t responsible for resolving those feelings of scarcity or betrayal in others. She made a personal choice based on what was right for her. That doesn’t erase the conversations we might want to have about her platform or decisions—but it also doesn’t justify the tone of some of the commentary I saw which was bitchy and ugly.
I’m not arguing that we all need to be endlessly kind or gentle. I’m saying we can challenge each other and still hold space for humanity. That we can talk about power and platform without projecting our personal disappointments onto someone else. And that how we respond to moments like this says a lot about the kind of culture we’re shaping—not just the one we’re reacting to.
Great piece, Sarah. I’m still trying to process my feelings about it all. When I read certain Notes on Substack yesterday I was scratching my head as I couldn’t understand what she had done that was so wrong. And it all leaves a rather unpleasant after taste. You’re so right, it will put potential readers off from coming to the platform.
Hello Helen! She didn’t arrive graciously enough :) but yes, nothing really, and it took that amount of nothing for people to start being unpleasant.
Couldn't agree more with your words...and I can't help but unsee the truth that the writer who wrote the passive aggressive "I love you but there is no room for you here" piece used it as an opportunity to try and go viral (ironic, right?) ugh.
Oh undoubtedly. She was going for clicks. Shame on her.
She is an activist that does good work for all. I wasn't aware of her until I read this and ffs the women who pushed her out should be ashamed of themselves. Anyone who does positive work is needed more than ever in this world. It doesn't matter about fame.
You better preach, honey!!!! (Also, “it clashes with your bio” is EPIC 🤣. I didn’t catch that on my first read of Abbey’s post). I’m so frustrated as well. I wrote about it too. Thank you for being brave enough to take a stand!! - https://open.substack.com/pub/sarahfrancesmccormick/p/when-women-turn-on-women-my-story?r=1nznlu&utm_medium=ios
Freaking A… yesss. 💯 spot on, Sarah. The “open letter” was especially vile.
That was my least favourite bit :(
This all makes me so sick, that I don't even want to find the damn open letter. One more view to crap doesn't feel right. I'll just trust that it was total BS.
Feeling all of this. This whole thing really upset me. Thanks for putting words to it 🫶🏼
🎯I wrote a few notes since yesterday - also connected with Abby and Glennon was gracious and kind - and responded to me too. This literally made me sick. I’ve experienced this kind of scapegoating. Furious.
It’s so awful. There’s just no need at all and people who are saying that she should be big enough to take the criticism just don’t in my opinion have a point. She’s just a human being like the rest of us.
Thank you Kelly, I'm catching up now. And, I AM FURIOUS. I'll try to ready out to Glennon also, but if you hear again, please let them know MANY secure women are furious this happened to her.
Don’t thank me! Thank Sarah for this amazing essay.
Consider it done!!!
And thank you!!!! For reminding me to thank Sarah!
This whole situation has broken my heart. Did we as a community (I say we but I’m very new here) just create the platform we didn’t want? When I received Glennon’s email I had so much respect for her boundaries. And I calculated this platform just lost at least 100K new followers that she brought with her.
Well, this is it isn’t it Elizabeth. She would’ve brought a whole load of people here who hadn’t used Substack before and some of them would’ve stuck around and started paying attention to and reading the work of other people. And that has now also been lost. People are so incredibly shortsighted.
Heartbroken is the right phrase here. It's a grey day for Substack.
Amen, sister. I hate that this happened, but it sure seemed to separate the wheat from the chaff over here. I just wrote a whole thing about scapegoating, and how this was a textbook example of that. I am so sad and mad and disappointed, and I'm also so proud of the quiet dignity and deep embodiment that she displayed in not taking that shit. Thank you for perfectly verbalizing the way that women keep other women small.
THIS:
"Jealousy disguised as discernment.
Scarcity disguised as values.
Gatekeeping masked as integrity."
Yes, yes, a thousand yeses. The saccharine magnanimous notes pleading her to please consider the little people and have some humility were the ones that really got my temperature up. I've been manipulated by too many people tucking their judgment in between compliments to not feel triggered by that nonsense. Sigh.
Thanks for being furious and fantastic. 💪🧡
“I've been manipulated by too many people tucking their judgment in between compliments to not feel triggered by that nonsense.” Same, Lighthouse. Off to read your piece now 🕯️♥️
It really has shown some people up for what they are xx
Oh Sarah this was immense and expressed so perfectly and I am both heartbroken and enraged at how people can be so cruel but also so blind to the ripple impact of having someone like Glennon here. It saddens me that there is still so much competitive bitchiness between women. You raise so many important points and I truly hope some of those people who chased her away with their mean girl attitude will see their mistakes… sadly I’m not sure they will but well done for writing these words. We get to rise together. Xxx
Thank you Lauren. I think history shows us that these kind of people do never learn because the viewpoint is so firmly focused on themselves and what things mean to them that they just don’t really see it. I only hope that the next woman to arrive here who already has a profile Isn’t treated in the same way. I do actually think that there was something specific to GD about all of this.
It’s highlighted something for sure. Xx
This🙌🏻 I’ve always been amazed at the whole female empowerment movement who tell you can do anything and then when you do tear you down. Let’s change this.